Last week, one of the saddest stories ever witnessed in US pop culture came to a close. Though I would never consider myself a Michael Jackson fan, the breadth of his influence as an entertainer cannot be denied - even in the small east Texas town where I grew up. During the 70's and 80's, his music was everywhere. One would be hard pressed to find someone who doesn't know the name Michael Jackson, much less anyone who never heard his music.
Yet, in spite of the influence and celebrity, as well as his immense talent, we've seen his personal life spiral out of control and become a media spectacle in recent years. His life seemed to be unraveling before our eyes. Lawsuits, bizarre behavior, accusations, rumors of drug abuse became a regular part of the man's life and overshadowed his incredible talent. Considering how his life had been geared for the spotlight since childhood, and that his private life had become such public event, it is little wonder that his demise happened just in time for the evening news. However, I find it odd that the same reporters who referred to Jackson as "Jacko" during the child molestation trial in 2005 and in the time since, now simply refer to him today as "Michael" in reverent tones. I guess in his death, it is more fitting to allow such a tortured soul that bit of mercy.
I get most of my news from the headlines that appear on the Drudge Report (flame away all of you Drudge haters!) and in the days since there have been a lot of articles appearing there about Michael Jackson. A lot of them have been nothing but fluff, talking about how much pain he was in, how talented he was, how he never got to be a normal child, on and on. I would be the last person qualified to analyze the life Michael Jackson lived. But, one article appeared on Drudge that caught my attention. Rabbi Shmuley Boteach spent a good deal of time since the 2005 molestaton trial counseling Michael Jackson and became one of his close friends. In an unguarded moment, he once said the following to the rabbi:
"I am going to say something I have never said before and this is the truth. I have no reason to lie to you and God knows I am telling the truth. I think all my success and fame, and I have wanted it, I have wanted it because I wanted to be loved. That's all. That's the real truth. I wanted people to love me, truly love me, because I never really felt loved. I said I know I have an ability. Maybe if I sharpened my craft, maybe people will love me more. I just wanted to be loved because I think it is very important to be loved and to tell people that you love them and to look in their eyes and say it."
At the bottom of everything that has been so weird, sad, frightening, angering about what we all have seen of this man's life, that statement is most telling. Regardless of what was done to him or what he did to others, ultimately one of life's deepest longings went unfulfilled in his life from an early age. As he matured, he merely sought to fill the void with the fame and fortune that came all to easy to him. I don't know when it happened, but at some point he realized that he couldn't make enough money to quiet the longing within him for love. That need cried out in him and no avenue was unwasted pursuing a remedy that he would never find.
Meat Loaf's Grammy Award winning song "I would do anything for love, but I won't do that" comes to mind. Many dispise him. Many others laugh and crack jokes. I can't find the strength to do either. We look at Michael Jackson and see the tragedy: a man did everything he could to find love on this earth only to find all those things - including the more despicable things - could not fill the void. In fact, he became what many would refer to as a "monster" before the end.
The truth is, in spite of all the fame, fortune and all that such a lifestyle could afford, the self-professed "King of Pop" wasn't so different from us at all.
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